Archive for the ‘Update’ Category

Cease and Desist???

Saturday, June 7th, 2008

[I received this email yesterday. — Rob]

June 6, 2008
Re: sexbots going off to war dream

Dear : Robert Terrell and Jason Torchinsky,

It has come to my attention that you have made an unauthorized use of my copyrighted short film entitled “Danny Bot” (the “Work”). I have reserved all rights in the Work, which was first published in teh Internet on 2004, and I have registered the copyright.

Your dream entitled “Bring Our Sexbots Home” is essentially identical to the Work and clearly used the Work as its basis: http://www.dannybot.com/
As you neither asked for nor received permission to use the Work as the basis for your dream, nor to make or distribute copies, including electronic copies, of same, or to talk about, discuss, or convey through email, instant message, billboards, sign language, ham radio, semaphore, pig latin, or ubbi-dubbi; I believe you have willfully infringed my rights under 17 U.S.C. Section 101 et seq. and could be liable for statutory damages as high as $150,000 as set forth in Section 504(c)(2) therein.

I demand that you immediately cease any and all infringing dreams derived from the Work, and all copies of said dream, including electronic copies, memories, recollections, reminiscences, impressions, memes, or engrams of same, and that you deliver to me, if applicable, all unused, undistributed copies, memories, recollections, reminiscences, impressions, memes, or engrams of same, or destroy such copies memories, recollections, reminiscences, impressions, memes, or engrams immediately and that you desist from this or any other infringement, conscious, unconscious, or subconscious of my rights in the future. If I have not received an affirmative response from you by Thermidor 19, 2100, indicating that you have fully complied with these requirements, I shall bring further action against you.

Very truly yours,

Daniel J. Bot
http://www.dannybot.com/

Honey, I Blew Up the Blog!

Tuesday, May 20th, 2008

So yeah, we blew up the old blog. It was a group effort. T. Mike helped by not backing up the database, I did my share by upgrading the blog software. Alan and Galen were nearby when it happened, and they made no heroic lunges at the keyboard to prevent us. Only Charles gets a pass, because a tree fell on his house and he left early. 

Now we’ve got this WordPress blog. Hopefully it’ll be simpler to use. I’ll import the database files we do have later on. 

Goodbye, Movable Type…

Tuesday, May 20th, 2008

…and hello, WordPress.

Come on, Internet, be our Valentine! So lose the pants!

Wednesday, February 13th, 2008

Hey! It’s Valentine’s time! And in the current VGG tradition of barely updating this site with old content, ghost-ship style, here’s another bit of holiday fun from a former day of what we assumed was glory.

Valentine Cards, of the disappointing virtual variety, suitable for sending to an alleged sweetie as your way of saying, “I barely care about this holiday– for eternity, my love, eternity!”

Introduzione alla Slot Gates Of Olympus

Saturday, January 5th, 2008
Gates of Olympus

La slot machine Gates Of Olympus, creata da Pragmatic Play, è diventata un’icona nel mondo dei giochi online. Questa slot unica si distingue per la sua grafica accattivante, meccaniche innovative e potenziali vincite elevate. In questo articolo, esploreremo le caratteristiche chiave di Gates Of Olympus, fornendo ai giocatori tutte le informazioni necessarie per vivere un’esperienza di gioco indimenticabile.

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La slot Gates Of Olympus offre un’esperienza di gioco rivoluzionaria grazie alle sue caratteristiche uniche. Il gioco si svolge sul Monte Olimpo, con Zeus che guida i giocatori attraverso un’avventura mitologica. La funzione di caduta dei rulli permette a simboli vincenti di scomparire e essere sostituiti da nuovi, aumentando le possibilità di vincita consecutive. Inoltre, i moltiplicatori possono aumentare le vincite fino a 500x, rendendo ogni giro potenzialmente molto remunerativo.

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Strategie di Gioco per Gates Of Olympus

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Gates Of Olympus e l’Esperienza Mobile

Gates Of Olympus è ottimizzato per l’esperienza mobile, garantendo che i giocatori possano godere del gioco su dispositivi smartphone e tablet senza compromessi sulla qualità. La fluidità del gioco e la qualità grafica rimangono impeccabili su tutte le piattaforme, rendendo possibile vivere l’emozione di Gates Of Olympus ovunque ci si trovi.

Perché Giocare a Gates Of Olympus

Ci sono molte ragioni per cui Gates Of Olympus è diventato un preferito tra i giocatori. Oltre alle sue innovative caratteristiche di gioco e ai potenziali grandi premi, offre un’esperienza di gioco coinvolgente e divertente. Che si tratti di ammirare la grafica ispirata alla mitologia greca o di aspettare con ansia quel grande moltiplicatore, Gates Of Olympus promette e consegna un’avventura di gioco di qualità superiore.

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Guida Completa al Gioco del Plinko nei Casinò

Tuesday, January 30th, 2007
Plinko

Il Plinko è un gioco di straordinaria semplicità ma di grande fascino, amato nei casinò di tutto il mondo. In questo articolo, esploreremo tutti gli aspetti di questo affascinante gioco, dalle sue origini alla strategia di gioco, passando per le varianti disponibili e i consigli per massimizzare le possibilità di vincita.

Origini e Storia del Plinko

Il Plinko ha origini relativamente recenti rispetto ad altri giochi da casinò, ma ha rapidamente guadagnato popolarità grazie alla sua presenza in famosi show televisivi. Nato come gioco di pura fortuna, il Plinko ha conquistato i cuori degli appassionati di casinò per la sua immediatezza e l’emozione che riesce a generare in pochi istanti. L’idea alla base del gioco è semplice: una palla viene lasciata cadere da un punto alto di una tavola forata e rimbalza casualmente tra i chiodi, fino a raggiungere una delle fessure numerate alla base, ognuna con un diverso valore di vincita.

Come Si Gioca al Plinko?

Il fulcro del Plinko https://www.perininavi.it/plinko/risiede nella sua semplicità. I giocatori devono semplicemente scegliere un punto da cui lasciar cadere la palla e aspettare che questa raggiunga una delle fessure alla base della tavola. Nonostante il risultato dipenda principalmente dalla fortuna, alcuni giocatori affermano di avere delle tecniche per influenzare leggermente l’esito, come scegliere il punto di rilascio della palla o il momento giusto per farla cadere.

Strategie e Consigli per il Plinko

Anche se il Plinko è un gioco principalmente basato sulla fortuna, esistono alcune strategie che possono aiutare a ottimizzare le possibilità di vincita. Prima di tutto, è importante familiarizzare con la disposizione dei chiodi e delle fessure sul tabellone, poiché questo può offrire una leggera indicazione su dove la palla potrebbe avere maggiori probabilità di finire. Inoltre, gestire il budget è fondamentale: stabilire un limite di perdita e una quota di vincita può aiutare a mantenere il controllo del gioco.

Varianti del Plinko nei Casinò Online

Con la popolarità del gioco online, sono emerse diverse varianti del Plinko. Queste varianti possono includere tavole di dimensioni diverse, una varietà di schemi di chiodi e fessure con differenti valori di vincita. Alcuni casinò online offrono anche versioni tematiche del Plinko, con grafiche e suoni personalizzati per aumentare l’immersione nel gioco.

Perché il Plinko è Così Popolare?

Il successo del Plinko nei casinò e nelle piattaforme online si deve a diversi fattori. La sua semplicità lo rende accessibile a tutti, anche a chi si avvicina per la prima volta al mondo dei giochi da casinò. Inoltre, la tensione e l’eccitazione generate dal percorso imprevedibile della palla creano un’atmosfera di grande coinvolgimento, rendendo ogni partita unica e avvincente.

Conclusione

Il Plinko è un gioco che, nonostante la sua apparente semplicità, nasconde un fascino inesauribile. Che si tratti di una partita veloce o di una sessione più lunga, il Plinko sa sempre come intrattenere e coinvolgere, offrendo un mix perfetto di suspense e divertimento. Se non avete ancora provato questo eccezionale gioco, vi invitiamo a farlo: potreste scoprire il vostro nuovo passatempo preferito nei casinò!

Guida Completa a Crazy Time: Il Gioco da Casinò Che Conquista il Web

Wednesday, January 3rd, 2007
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Come Vincere a Crazy Time: Strategie e Consigli

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Violated by Bears Man Shirts Finally here!

Wednesday, October 11th, 2006

Who says we don’t listen to our fans? Other than our fans? Well, we do. Because we’ve gotten requests for Violated by Bears Man shirts, and now we have them.

Now you too can look like America’s most pitiable superhero!

In Defense of The Gumby Lounge Singers

Tuesday, October 10th, 2006

Now that the draft is complete, and Rob has enlightened us with his scientific approach to sketch comedy (which sure explains a lot about Rob’s sketch comedy “career”), I feel duty-bound to share with you the greatness that is The Gumby Lounge Singers (and if you don’t know the derivation of the name, may I suggest a more remedial class?).

Alan had a great idea about naming a bandleader, and since it was his addition to the game, I’m following his rules. I’m guessing I can pick an actual Saturday Night Live bandleader if I want, but he picked a memorable musical act from the many who performed on SNL: Shane MacGowan, drunken frontman of The Pogues. In that same vein, I’m picking a musician with a checkered SNL past: Elvis Costello. He was banned from the show for switching songs (he was asked not to play “Radio Radio” because of its lyrics, and he switched during the live show, which also put the show behind schedule), but he’s back in the good graces again, and he’s my choice to lead the band.

So with Elvis Costello conducting, and the band blaring the SNL theme, it’s time to meet the cast. Don Pardo, take it away!

I said, Don Pardo, take it away!

Hmm, Don must be at lunch. Okay, I’ll tell you about The Gumby Lounge Singers:

The men
Eddie Murphy, Bill Murray, Jon Lovitz, Darrell Hammond, Joe Piscopo, and Ben Stiller

This may be the best collection of male cast members in the league. I have two charismatic leading men in Murphy and Murray. Lovitz and Piscopo would be the stars on any other cast, but here they complement the top bananas with legendary characters of their own. Impressions will be a team strength, especially with Hammond and Piscopo anchoring the squad. Even Ben Stiller (who I mistakenly picked over Tracy Morgan) will contribute through his impressions and boyish charm.

The women
Nora Dunn, Jane Curtin, and Kristen Wiig

I’m very happy with the women I’ve selected, I think they are all immensely talented and three of the best actresses to perform on SNL, yet I can see that in general they fit the same category. Dunn has some crazy characters, and really it’s too early in Wiig’s career to generalize, but the three of them have a more subtle approach to sketch comedy. I could have an awesome Nora Ephron-written sketch about three society women at lunch with these ladies. I should have grabbed a goofball like Rachel Dratch or Cheri Oteri to complement the styles (hmmm, Rob has Oteri and Dratch, along with Molly Shannon; looks like he’s in the same situation only with goofballs).

The Weekend Update anchor
Jane Curtin

Like I said in the Round Ten summary, Curtin was one of the earliest (replacing Chevy Chase behind the desk), one of the longest-running (80 episodes, tied for third most all-time), and simply one of the best anchors ever on Saturday Night Live. She has a great catchphrase, “Good night, and have a pleasant tomorrow,” and that is critical for a quality anchor. She’ll have to bring her “A” game every week, though; unlike other casts (especially Alan’s), my team is a little weak at Update commentaries. Thank the heavens above for Darrell Hammond.

Overall, I’m very pleased. Is this the perfect cast? Of course not, but no cast ever will. The Gumby Lounge Singers, though, has to be considered one of the favorites to win the Fantasy SNL League.

SNL Draft – the morning after

Monday, October 9th, 2006

This email was sent by Rob to the others the morning after the draft.

So, Good morning, bitches. (No offense intended; I use that term scientifically, as I will explain below.) I hope you’ve slept off your draft-induced hangovers and are now staring, groggily, at your poor excuse for a cast, wondering what in God’s name you were thinking. Because your cast sucks. At least, from the scientific standpoint.

Science is that wonderful arbiter of objectivity. (Objectivity is that wonderful trait that helps us avoid, say, picking Chris Elliot when Bill Murray is still available.) Science is based on fact and observation. Using the SNL web site, I was able to download a series of facts about each of the cast members: number of seasons on the cast, number of guest appearances, number of repeating characters, and number of impressions performed. Using these stats, I devised a formula to generate each player’s objective “power ranking.”

The formula is weighted, so that some factors matter more (i.e. if you’re on the cast for just one season, you’re not getting ranked very high, no matter how many impressions you can do).

Based on this formula, the top ten cast members include: Phil Hartman (#1 power ranking), Will Ferrell, Darrell Hammond, Dana Carvey, Tim Meadows, Jon Lovitz, and Jan Hooks. Each of these had a power ranking of 78 or higher. (Galen — your side bet was a sucker’s bet.)

Now, although only a few of these are emotional fan favorites, please remember, science knows best. Many emotional favorites are near the top of the list, to be sure, so they get their due. But it’s true that some founding cast members tend to trail some of the more recent cast members, perhaps because their lust for Hollywood, cocaine, or the grave led them to leave the show too early, and thus not develop the “power” of, say, a Horatio Sanz.

Some of the worst are: Peter Akroyd (1.5 power score), Chris Elliot (a 3.5 score) and Sarah Silverman (a 4.5 score) — sorry, Jason. For reference, Gilbert Gottfried is scored at 4.5. So you can see, the rankings do work. But some of our favorites are these cellar dwellers. Drafting favorites, or hiring a cast member because you wish you could fuck her, can lead to very low power rankings, and herpes.

So, how did we do? Not so good. Galen’s number-one overall pick, John Belushi, had a power ranking of 23. The number two pick overall, Charles’ Eddie Murphy, had a power ranking of 40. My pick, number three overall, was Chevy Chase with a power ranking of 31. Clearly, Billy Beane we’re not.

By this formula, each cast’s combined power ranking is (in draft order):
Galen: 408.5

Galen’s cast is, from the first pick, mid-level players. Not until he drafts Jan Hooks (his third selection) does he sniff the top ten. Don Novello (#63) was picked at least two rounds too early. Amazingly, Galen left plenty of firepower on the table with each pick. I’ll admit it. He rattled me. I could not imagine what he was thinking. I suppose he was aiming for a funny, rather than powerful, cast. Weird. What saved his bacon were the late picks of Fred Amisen (power ranking of 26) and Maya Rudolph (power ranking of 18) in the late rounds. Tina Fey (#60 overall, #5 anchor) for news was a solid, although not spectacular, choice.
Charles: 472

Now, clearly, Charles knows this shit cold. He’s obviously participated in many mock drafts before, and he was ready to intimidate. After Galen’s pick of John Belushi for #1 overall, Charles lets Galen know: “YOU FUCKED UP!!!” Indeed, Galen did. But then so did Charles. His pick, for #2 overall, was Eddie Murphy — a top 50 candidate, to be sure, but he ignored Phil Hartman (power ranking #1). Charles proceeds to load up from the top tier of the power rankings: Murray (#21), Lovitz (#8 power ranking), and later Hammond (#4) and Piscopo (#26). But he’s picking with heart, not his brain. A man of science would have cherry-picked Hammond before Murray. And later he picks Stiller (#74), who apparently stored up his power-ranking for his own TV show. After the 4th round selection of Nora Dunn (#34), Charles thought Kristen Wiig (#82) was the best woman left — forgetting that Tina Fey (#60) was still available as an actress. Or maybe he had the yips: Julia-Louis Dreyfus (#52), Ana Gasteyer (#12), Julia Sweeney (#49), Amy Poehler (#13), and Rachel Dratch (#11) were all available when he made his boneheaded Ben Stiller pick. But overall, Charles’ cast is one of the strongest.
(I’ll save myself for last.)
Alan: 257

From the very first — Al Franken (#37) — Alan dug himself into the cellar. It was yet another first-round selection that let #1 Phil Hartman slide. Luckily, Dan Ackroyd (#18) and Laraine Newman (#36) were huge finds lingering in the third and fourth rounds, but Alan followed those good discoveries with draft dodgers Harry Shearer (#58) and A. Whitney Brown (#71). Harry Shearer makes sense if you follow up with Christopher Guest and get some Spinal Tap skits out of it, but A. Whitney Brown in the sixth round? Hammond, Meadows, Crystal and Piscopo were all still available. (And Hammond and Meadows were still sitting at the presumed lottery picks’ table, looking more and more forlorn, their mommas crying into their big hats, as minor role take their guaranteed salaries. A travesty.) Alan does show good sense in picking up Dennis Miller in the second round, #10 overall. A good choice, because aside from his low overall score (#71) as he’s the #2 news anchor in the entire draft. I had planned on taking Miller with my first round pick, until I saw that Galen and Charles left Chevy Chase (#31 overall, #1 anchor) for the pickings. Alan mops up with Gross and Vance — both going in garbage rounds as expected — but Alan loses all sense by picking O’Donoghue (#105) in the final round, with a dozen more powerful players undrafted.
T. Mike: 534

The crazy-eye killa of this draft. He knew that, by his draft position, he’d get consecutive picks. Therefore, he could pick up any matched pair. And he got the #1 duo on the table: Myers (#15) and Carvey (#5). I’m sure he picked them in reverse power-ranking order just to fuck with our heads. Then, he picks up an all-star top-fifty supporting cast: Farley (#26), Sandler (#28), Schneider (#44), and somehow finds top-ten pick Horation Sanz (#10) in the sixth. Once the men are secured, he turns his steely-yet-crazy-eyed gaze upon the women: Jackson (#51), Gasteyer (#13), and Duke (#66). Please note that T. Mike did not make a selection below the top 66, while one of y’all bitches dipped below #66 four times — twice below 100. Who might that be?
Jason: 337.5

Jason, who claimed at the start to be the most unprepared, proved true to his word. After a making us all look dumb with his first selection, Phil Hartman (#1), Jason stank up the joint with Chris Elliot (#108). Chris Rock (#45) was a poor third-round pick, given the talent left. Martin Short (#56), Christopher Guest (#79), and Sarah Silverman (#103) were all picked a round or two too early. What’s going on? Have we found our Billy Beane? No, clearly not, as he picks the loathesome Brian Doyle-Murray (#75) and even worse Kevin Nealon (#7 anchor) for the news desk. Amy Poehler (#20) in the last round would have been an inspired selection, if it had in fact been inspired, rather than desperately picking the first remaining female cast member Galen could name.
Rob: 733

You see, you’re all my bitches. Scientifically speaking, of course.

My plan was to lock in the best newscaster I could first, and then build a cast around that. I expected to settle happily for Dennis Miller, but as I said Galen rattled me, but I was able to recover and select Chevy Chase (#1 news anchor) in the first round. I took Will Ferrell (#2) in the second round, and Chris Kattan (#4) in the third — a choice that everyone thought was mind-bogglingly dumb. (His nearly 100 power points, combined with Will Ferrell’s and Tim Meadows’ (#7), by themselves beats Jason’s total cast score.) I was playing to win, bitches. I doubled up on Chase as actor — a dumb move, considering who was left: Sanz, Farley, Hammond, et al. My heart was pounding with the excitement, and doubtless all that blood it sent into my brain was having some affect on my logic and reason. I knew that drafting Spade (#29) was like trading for Sprewell — the fans will hate the move, but his 47 points were sorely needed. Then I added Cheri Oteri (#22) for the Spartan Cheerleader skit (I half expected Charles to block me on that). Then I saw Meadows (#6) was still available, so I got them too. Molly Shannon (#19) and Rachel Dratch (#11) and were also highly-ranked undrafted players, so I mopped up with them. In the garbage round, somehow Jimmy Fallon (#8 overall, 90 power points) was standing there, hat in hand, so I grabbed him. Again, my last four selections beat Alan’s total combined cast score.
Now, secure in the knowledge of your bitchiness, you may be asking “These power rankings do, indeed, reveal heretofore unseen truths about the casts. But could they be improved?” Absolutely, but only in the context of the casts themselves. For instance, while my cast is entirely all-stars, what if they don’t gel?

T. Mike’s cast is, in fact, the cast whose parts fit together the best. This can be easily shown by listing all of the skits that his cast can perform — i.e. Mike Myers + Dana Carvey = Wayne’s World. And along these lines, Charles’ cast could too be a contender for the best cast.

The next step for these rankings is for me to generate a list of all skits and all cast members, and determine the total number of known skits that can be performed by each cast. Popular or funny skits will be weighted more highly than unpopular or unfunny skits.

Then, we’ll really see who’s the bitch here. Scientifically speaking, that is.
— Rob

Rnd Drafter Draftee Draftee Score Draftee Rank
1 Galen John Belushi 55 23
Charles Eddie Murphy 32 40
Rob Chevy Chase 45 31
Alan Al Franken 38 37
Jason Phil Hartman 113 1
T.Mike Mike Myers 72.5 15
2 T.Mike Dana Carvey 99.5 5
jason Chris Elliott 3.5 107
Alan Dennis Miller 13 69
Rob Will Ferrell 111 2
Charles Bill Murray 57 21
Galen Gilda Radner 42.5 32
3 Galen Jan Hooks 78 10
Charles Jon Lovitz 81.5 8
Rob Chris Kattan 103.5 4
Alan Dan Aykroyd 71.5 17
Jason Chris Rock 29 45
T.Mike Chris Farley 51.5 25
4 T.Mike Norm MacDonald 32 41
jason Martin Short 21 56
Alan Laraine Newman 38.5 36
Rob Chevy Chase 45 31
Charles Nora Dunn 39.5 34
Galen Tina Fey 19 60
5 Galen Don Novello 16.5 63
Charles Jane Curtin 39.5 33
Rob Cheri Oteri 56.5 22
Alan Harry Shearer 20 58
Jason Sarah Silverman 4.5 103
T.Mike Victoria Jackson 28 50
6 T.Mike Adam Sandler 48.5 27
jason Christopher Guest 10.5 79
Alan A. Whitney Brown 12.5 71
Rob David Spade 47 29
Charles Darrell Hammond 107.5 3
Galen Billy Crystal 27.5 51
7 Galen Garrett Morris 39 35
Charles Joe Piscopo 54 24
Rob Tim Meadows 96 6
Alan Mary Gross 24 53
Jason Brian Doyle-Murray 12 75
T.Mike Rob Schneider 30.5 43
8 T.Mike Horatio Sanz 81 9
jason Kevin Nealon 74.5 13
Alan Tim Kazurinsky 29 47
Rob Molly Shannon 62.5 20
Charles Kristen Wiig 9.5 81
Galen Maya Rudolph 70.5 18
9 Galen Fred Armisen 51 26
Charles Ben Stiller 12 74
Rob Rachel Dratch 76.5 11
Alan Danitra Vance 6.5 93
Jason Julia Sweeney 28 49
T.Mike Ana Gasteyer 74.5 12
10 T.Mike Robin Duke 16 66
jason Amy Poehler 62.5 19
Alan Michael O’Donoghue 4 106
Rob Jimmy Fallon 90 7
Charles Jane Curtin 39.5 33
Galen Terry Sweeney 9.5 83