Archive for the ‘Predictably Crude’ Category

Your DNA in Space!

Tuesday, September 23rd, 2008
Is that [spacex] launch today?

think its postponed

good, maybe there’s still time to get my payload on there

if you want your dna to go into space, just sneak through the fence and jack off onto the rocket.

it’s what I did.

that’s good thinking

they should have a glory hole in the thing. anyone who wants their dna in space can just walk up and fuck the rocket

they could charge a little

I sense a business opportunity here

say, $10

that’s a really good idea

we should make this! buy the biggest hobby rocket you can get, stick a glory hole in it, put a copy of hustler on a string tied to the top for anyone who needs inspiration, and sell tickets


also, another marketing angle:


Either of these would get a good amount of response

you go drag an old silo back from outside of town

I’ll get a craigslist ad up

wait — webcam. sell access to the live video of the guys jacking off into the rocket.

we are going to be so rich.


all we need is a rocket, a fleshlight, some bottles of lube and a hot-glue gun

I can get a rocket at Apex surplus

I’ve already got a hot glue gun!!!!

and lube!

do they have surplus fleshlights?

we don’t need a good one.

sort of: they have pig vaginas in cans


I challenge any of our customers to notice the difference.

it’s actually a bit of an upgrade.

this is gonna be BIG

The best defense is a good offense

Tuesday, October 24th, 2006

In the defense of his fantasy Saturday Night Live team: T. Mike has only one thing to say:

T. Mike’s team eats bitches like your teams and shits them out like the bitches they are. Bitch, you just got bitch-shitted, bitch- how’s that make your bitch self feel, bitch?

All y’all haterz just be riding T. Mike’s jock.