 |
|
|
|
Prove Us Wrong Number 17
Attention netizens, this is your captain speaking. Welcome aboard Prove Us Wrong flight number 17. We are still making our ascent, so we ask that you remain seated and leave your tray tables in the upright and locked position. We will soon reach our cruising altitude, at which time we will be high above any criticism, and out of reach of any argument or debate. Our in-flight movie today is "Battlefield Earth," a wonderful... uh folks we're experiencing some turbulence... uh heavy turbulence, but I'm sure that... uh oh. Uh folks, I'm going to ask that you all think happy thoughts right now as we seem to have lost a wing. Mayday! Mayday! Tower, this is Prove Us Wrong #17, we have lost all forward credibility and are rapidly being shot down in flames!! Mayday! Tower, do you read?! MAYDAY!!!!
RESOLVED:
The best part of any commercial jet plane trip is going to the airplane bathroom.
Date: Tuesday, December 19, 2000 8:21 PM
From: kjohn04@(deleted)
Most of the subjects that are posted to proove wrong are really tough. In fact, most of the subjects take a little while to think of some quality bull to put a little dent in whatever truth you have come across. In all the times that I come to this site to be challenged by your wits I have never been more disappointed in the VGGs.......
That aside I think that everyone will agree that there is nothing worse than having to get up out of the seat (especially if you are in a window seat) excuse yourself by the fattest, rudest person on the plane and go into a high class Johnny-on-the-spot. Think about it. That's pretty much what you are walking into there. There is nothing good about a closet with a half -sized toilet. What is with the blue water anyway? Turbulance.....stained clothes.... everyone thinking you went diving in after something. Aslo, it never fails that you're going to go in after the person that had one of everything on the menu at Taco Bell plus a full can of pork and beans. The things wreak. Personally I think the most enjoyable part of the flight is either boarding or getting off the plane. Only because I am going on vacation or coming home.
Kelly
To Rebut:
You're disappointed in us? Hey, I got news for YOU, pal! You can never, ever be as disappointed in the Van Gogh-Goghs as we are in ourselves. Ever! Wait.
Okay, you bring up a lot of good points, but what about the bowel and bladder relieving? What about the fact you are peeing and pooping FIVE MILES above the surface of the Earth?! Inside a giant gleaming silver winged bus?! I mean, whoa! It's wacky! It's nutty! It's ...it's... you're not buying any of this for a second are you? The getting off the plane is the best part isn't it? You've proved us wrong, haven't you?
Damn.
Date: Thursday, December 21, 2000 7:29 PM
From: EricRhoemer@(deleted)
Nay, the best part of any flight is not going to the airplane bathroom. If
you'd simply said "going to the bathroom," I might have seen the fun in the
that (can you just imagine what the stewardess.... Ah nevermind). The best
part of any commercial flight is screwing with the "flight attendants." I
mean, you've got a long trip ahead of you, and you're only ray of light is
the bathroom? If, perhaps, there was a special someone waiting for you in
said bathroom it might be interesting. But... no. These "Flight Attendants"
typically don't like their jobs. Making fun of them just might push 'em over
the edge! Ha ha. Yes indeedy. "There's sumpin' on da wing. Sum...ping...
on the wing." To which the "flight attendant replies: "Very clever...
(moron)." Or: "This isn't one of those bad planes, is it? I specifically
asked for a no communist plane."
To Rebut:
Oh, how droll. Yes, that "Terror at 20,000 Feet" Twilight Zone episode schtick just blossoms evergreen, doesn't it. Yes, the Algonquin Round Table could hardly have done better. Someone get a crown of thorns, it's the second coming of Oscar Wilde! Oh, dear me. Let's leave the comedy to the professionals, dear boy, shall we? (Mental note - Steal "sumpin on da wing" bit- it's gold! The sap will never know! Hee hee!) Ahem. Yes, I'm sure tormenting the hard working members of our nation's airlines who risk life and limb day in and day out seems like jolly good fun to your ill-bred ilk. But those few of us in this world who still maintain their dignity have other, less crude ways of entertaining ourselves, like baiting Jews.
Date: Wednesday, December 27, 2000 7:54 PM
From: MethodBoy888(deleted)
dont call me chump slappy nuts
To Rebut:
Slappy nuts! Slappy nuts!!! HOW DARE YOU CALL ME SLAPPY NUTS! I'LL CALL YOU CHUMP AND WORSE, YOU NO GOOD MOTHERFU... my God they do slap, don't they? Damn, look at that. Slappin' away.
Hell.
Date: Wednesday, December 27, 2000 7:55:54 PM
From: MethodBoy888@(deleted)
The best part of any commercial jet plane trip is eating salty crackers and
reading playboy magazines duh!
To Rebut:
Whoa! Dude, no way did you score a Playboy on a flight! You are such a liar! They wouldn't have that as an in-flight magazine. You're just trying to show off like you think you're cool. Well, you know what? You're not.
Jerk.
Date: Wednesday, December 27, 2000 8:20 PM
From: MethodBoy888@(deleted)
i thinks you are a wuss, pansy flabbergasted nincomflabber! some little kids
that go "surfing" on this web page may be offended by wuss or jackass or dork
or ninny or doofus! your the doofus slappy crap! oh now don't you feel
stupid?! " keep it clean willya"
what a little dork! yo momma so fat she has to get out of her pants to get
into her pockets! so take that stupid lammo!
To Rebut:
Oh, it's you again, is it? And now you wanna play the old "Doin' the Dozens" street game of trading insults. Well mister, let me tell you in no uncertain terms that we don't appreciate you using your words to hurt, instead of to help. I will have you know that insults make Baby Jesus cry.
Okay, Baby Jesus could care less. But they make ME cry! I have feelings, too ya know! You're mean and I don't like you!
Mom! He hit me!
Date: Monday, January 1, 2001 10:13 PM
From: sten0040@(deleted)
RESOLVED: The best part of any commercial jet plane trip is going to the
airplane bathroom.
Actually, the best part of any commercial jet trip is stealing things.
$300+ for a seat, and they can't even leave the WHOLE can of Diet
Pepsi. You better believe I'm taking that little pillow, or the big
piece of cloth that passes as a blanket. It sort of helps to even
things out a little, and thus is the best part of a plane trip. There
really isn't anything to steal in the bathrooms. Thank you for your
time.
To Rebut:
Mind your jargon, my revolutionary brother. You did not "steal" those items, you LIBERATED them from our capitalistic oppressors, aw yeah! At $300+ a seat, I think we all know who is stealing what from whom! No? Well let me tell you: it is the AIRLINES stealing MONEY from YOU, my friend! All you want is the right of free travel to be able to see your comrades on May Day. But the MAN says you gotta pay HIS price! Well, I say the MAN is gonna get HIS wings clipped before the people... are you buying any of this? Is it at least distracting you from the fact that you proved us wrong and I just won't admit it?
Nuts.
Date: Friday, January 5, 2001 6:46 AM
From: julie@(deleted)
The only way I can see a trip to the bathroom as a truly wonderful thing on an air plane is if you get laid. Other wise I prefer the part at the beginning where your ears don't hurt, the person in front of you has not farted and the kid behind you has yet to wake up from the long wait in the airport . And of course when you land is nice too so that you can get out of your cramped seat and do something. But anyway getting laid anywhere is better than whatever else you would be doing except maybe your if your parents are there or in the hospital.
JULIE
To Rebut:
Ah, the Mile High Club. Damn their strict admission standards! One day they'll change the rules so you can, you know, get in the club by yourself, as it were. Alone. You know. Anyway, I think we can all agree getting laid is always better than anything else, except maybe getting laid twice. Why you would want to do it in a hospital with your parents there, is just, well, sick! (email me later- t.mike@vgg.com, we'll talk) Uh, I condemn you and your perversion! (seriously, EMAIL ME)
What're you looking at?
Buh-bye. Buh-bye. Bye bye. Watch your step. Bye. Bye bye. Thanks for flying Van Gogh Goghs. Buh-bye. Bye. Watch your step. Bye. Thanks for flying with us. Bye-bye. Bye. Bye. Good bye. Thank you for playing ...
Prove Us Wrong!
|
|
|
|
