How to Suck at Basketball

by Charles Rempel

I'm pretty good at playing basketball. It helps being tall, sure, but I also have some athletic ability and an idea of how to play the game. That being said, there are times when I want to play basketball but not at the most competitive pace, which seems to be the rage with all the kids nowadays.

Well, I have a system that I use to play basketball without having to be over-competitve, and now I'm offering my system to you. May I present "How to Suck at Basketball." If you follow this system in either Athletic or Spaz mode, you'll enjoy the game more than ever. Click on one of the choices below to take your first (sucky) step toward playing poorly!

Wardrobe

Running

Catching

Dribbling

Shooting

Etiquette